i recently discovered my disturbing inability to draw a frog.

March 15, 2009 at 10:51 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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the fuckit tadpole.

the fuckit tadpole.

My vagina speaks for itself.

February 13, 2009 at 7:42 pm | Posted in opinion | 2 Comments
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Natalie Dylan, San Diego native, college student, virign, is selling her deflowerment. So far she’s got a 3.7  million dollar vagina.

Dylan – her pseudonym – claims she needs the money for grad school. The Bunny Ranch in Nevada (where prostitution is legal) is brokering the deal. Her virginity has been up for sale since September 2008. (Why she is using a pseudonym when her picture and hometown – tools it would seem any determined net surfer could use to find her real name – is a mystery).

The plight of Dylan’s viriginty has Americans and the media eagerly tossing out labels: this is a stunt, ingenious, entrepreneurially ballsy, degrading, illegal.

On January 23, 2009 Dylan spoke out through a letter published by the Daily Beast. Essentially Dylan asserts that this is a social experiment. Womens studies classes and college professors got her thinking that virginity is another concept invented by a patriarichal society to keep women in their place. Here is an excerpt:

Like most little girls, I was raised to believe that virginity is a sacred gift a woman should reserve for just the right man. But college taught me that this concept is just a tool to keep the status quo intact. Deflowering is historically oppressive—early European marriages began with a dowry, in which a father would sell his virginal daughter to the man whose family could offer the most agricultural wealth. Dads were basically their daughters’ pimps. Continue Reading My vagina speaks for itself….

The penguin to do list.

December 7, 2008 at 1:44 am | Posted in Cool Things | Leave a comment
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If you would like to see a hilarious “March of the Penguins in 30 seconds” click here.

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Awkward comic.

November 3, 2008 at 8:11 pm | Posted in humor | Leave a comment
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stick figure commentary: my life at parties.

October 26, 2008 at 1:38 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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CLICK THE PICTURE TO EXPAND (CANT FIT WHOLE COMIC ON PAGE)

so today i
1. went to bed at 4am because I watched an episode of MASH and then ended up talking with my friend Sarah Jane until 4am.
2. woke up at 8 to go to sat. volunteer service in philly. tore through sarah jane’s door with death glares on my way out.
3. went into philly to work with the Mezzoni Center, an AIDS testing, counseling outreach center for gays lesbians bisexuals etc. Basically spent 3 hours with 5 gay guys and 4 other bryn mawr girls putting together condom outreach packets. So much fun.
4. came back to dorm and slept until 5:30.
5. the rain killed me on the way back from dinner. even with an umbrella and only 2 minutes outside to get to another building, my jeans, shoes and socks were soaked. those without umbrellas looked like they’d jumped in a pool.
6. went to my first college party.
7. no there was no alcohol, it was a mormon church party. (my sister: “Did you resist the alcohol?” Me: “It was a mormon church party.” sister: “oh so did you get alcohol?” Me: “…” sister: “Oh I thought you were being sarcastic.”)
8. for realz. My friend Sarah JAne invited me.
9. Carved a batman signal into a pumpkin while we were at the party. it looks badass.
10. it is 1:13am and i am now going to watch Music Man with Sarah Jane or kick her ass in Mario Kart.

the end.
(my last day of being 18!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

some back to school stick figure commentary

October 18, 2008 at 1:42 pm | Posted in school | 2 Comments
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The Back To School pros:

Continue Reading some back to school stick figure commentary…

Hobbies include: sitting on babies, impersonating Xena, & breathing.

August 10, 2008 at 6:18 pm | Posted in day to day | Leave a comment
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I’m still here. Haven’t been abducted by the aliens yet. That’s for another day.

I spent the last week on writing hiatus mostly due to sitting on babies for 7 dollars an hour.

1. Babysat an 11 month old for 3 hours every day (9am-12pm) for a week which takes a lot out of you. Especially waking up at 8am on a summer sleep schedule.

2. On Friday I babysat the 11 month old and my sister babysat a 2 1/2 year old. We were at the same place so we sat on our charges together. It was like real life nanny bonding. Chatting at the park while watching our respective charges amongst the other outsourced babysitters and young mothers (and the rare father), I felt like a bonafide Nanny. Only I wasn’t from another country and the money I made was for my plane ticket for Thanksgiving not a motel and food for the week. Continue Reading Hobbies include: sitting on babies, impersonating Xena, & breathing….

My grandmother has more beanie babies than you.

August 4, 2008 at 2:51 pm | Posted in day to day | Leave a comment
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We went to grandmother’s last Thursday and Friday. She’s moving to a condo and needs help sifting through the heaps and heaps of things – some of which are 20, 30, 40 years old – in her house and garage. My grandmother lives in an upper class LA neighborhood where the houses are alternately ugly and humongous or quaint expensive one story abodes. Apparently, my grandmother and Dustin Hoffman frequent the same Starbucks. This led to my sister’s “Was that Dustin Hoffman?” after every car that sped by. Continue Reading My grandmother has more beanie babies than you….

Alright, doc, keep your hands where i can see them!

July 30, 2008 at 2:56 pm | Posted in health | Leave a comment
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I walk into the medical district and my skin loses the tan I got from swimming, the slight brownish Filipino pallor I stole from my father, and any dirt that might hide the sudden glaring white that has taken up residence as my face. Doctor visits mean sitting on a papered table (depending on the type of visit, it may be a stirruped table), naked and freezing, while your doctor pulls on latex gloves and decides which part of your body to attack with pokes and prods first. And at the end of the visit, the reward is occasionally a stick in the arm with a needle or two.

I had a gynocologist appointment today to refill my birth control pills before I go off to college. My gynocologist is young, pretty, and nice. I’m just not to fond of her hands. I KNOW where they’ve been. Continue Reading Alright, doc, keep your hands where i can see them!…

I was thinking (and how did that go for you?): Romance Novels, Accidental Homicide, Pregnancy Tests.

July 3, 2008 at 11:21 am | Posted in Random Thoughts | 2 Comments
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My thoughts in bullet form.

  • I’ve relapsed. I slipped a week or so ago, thought I had a hold on it, but last night I knew for sure that I was in trouble. I am addicted to cheese – that is terribly plotted- ijusthrewupinmymouth dialogued- repetitive and predictable by the slowest of us – romance novels. God. I picked up the habit in tenth grade. I needed something to read and by golly Nora Roberts had half a bookstore to herself. I was a little awed, a little jealous. By the end of sophomore year I’d read every Roberts book in the local libraries (and had them placed on hold and transferred if the library was understocked; I throw myself into my habits to the point of self harm*). I moved on to Mary Higgens Clark. Then Nicholas Sparks. youjusthrewupinyourmouth. I know. Don’t kick me while I’m down. Continue Reading I was thinking (and how did that go for you?): Romance Novels, Accidental Homicide, Pregnancy Tests….
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